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Wednesday, May 20, 2009
FIP equated to Paris Hilton
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WHO IS THIS LOSER? your blog and video is as interesting as watching paris hilton talking about the economic downturn. go f. off and do something useful
Match fixing and KKR
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Talking about Match Fixing, here is a funny one i read online...
"A bookie calls Shane Warne before the match between Kolkata KnightRiders and Rajasthan Royals.
Cell phone rings. Warne picks up.
Warne : hello
Bookie : I am ….... Here.
Warne : yes tell me
Bookie : how is the pitch
Warne : ya dry and good for batting
Bookie : I want u to loose today’s match
Warne : impossible
Bookie : I will pay u $200,000
Warne : will be difficult to make KKR win.
Bookie : I will pay u $250,000
Warne : May be I could help you by reducing the margin… u tell by what margin we should win… will be much more easier
Bookie : no KKR should win
Warne : OK. I will try my best
Bookie : no make it.
Warne : OK.
Bookie : what will be the score
Warne : 200, if we bat first
Bookie : no make it 120
Warne : Impossible. Agarkar and Kartik are playing.
Bookie : 120 no change.
Warne : I will try
Bookie : OK. If KKR bat first
Warne : 110
Bookie : no make it 175
Warne : no u are asking too much. Ganguli is playing.
Bookie : OK make it $300,000
Warne : This would be the toughest match in my life
Bookie : OK, deal is made.
Warne : yes
Bookie : bye.
Match starts KKR bats first. KKR score only 120 in 20 overs. During the lunch break Shane’s cell rings.
Warne : hello
Bookie : its me. why did KKR score only 120. Our deal was 175.
Warne : What can I do ? They run one when they could run three, defend full toss, get out on wide balls, all catches and shots… I mean, if there is any… exactly directed to the fielders. But I will tell you this, Knight Riders are too good at this , I tried re-arranging the field…but they never miss a fielder.
Bookie : still u could bowl more no-balls. We got only 53 extras.
Warne : I asked all my bowlers to bowl badly. I also made Smith and Asnodkar bowl.
Bookie : Okay… leave that… I want u to loose the match.
Warne : I will try.
Bookie : Rajasthan Royals should be all out for 110
Warne : OK.
Bookie : bye.
Rajasthan Royals bats. They are making a serious attempt to not hit the ball and if at all they hit trying their best to hit to the fielders. They try to run only singles for doubles. But sometimes, they can’t stop themselves from running.
All Rajasthan Royals batsmen charged down to Kartik’s bowling and they purposely miss the ball hoping at least one
would hit the stumps. But they got to run a bye for that as McCullum is still searching for the ball . Inspite of the bad display of batting, they score 118 of 19 overs. Last over, 3 runs
required, the worst part is that its an Agarkar over. Warne is batting with Carseldine. Bookie gets really furious.
Warne is ready to face the last over his cell rings (he plays with his cell).
Warne : hello
Bookie : its me! . What are you upto ?
Warne : We tried the best we could
Bookie : OK forget it. I want u to loose the match
Warne : what can I do. Fate !!! Agarkar is bowling
Bookie : I don’t know… u are loosing
Agarkar bowls… Warne tries to hide his bat behind his back. But the ball hits the bat and goes to third man. So they take a single.
(cell rings)
Warne : sorry what can I do I was hiding my bat but still the ball comes and hit my bat. If I play much worse than this everybody will find out.
Bookie : (gets really tensed). OK I can understand. But please don’t take last two runs.
Warne talks to Carseldine. Agarkar bowls… a juicy full toss. Carseldine uses all his batting skills to restrict that one to a single. Scores are level.
(cell rings)
Bookie : OK. Past is past. Atleast finish it in a tie. I don’t know what u are going to do u are not taking a single or u give u’r bat to the umpire.
Warne : OK. OK. Don’t worry this time I will! see to it we are not taking the single. Let it be obvious also. I am not taking the single.
Agarkar bowls, unfortunately he bowls a no ball. RR wins the match.
Bookie goes mad and Shane warne faints in the field itself
Moral – With a team like KKR, who needs to fix a match
Appam chutiya Speaks - 1
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hey fake ipl player,
how are u, dude?? i have a matter to complain to u.. kaan maloo had taken my big 'bose' headphone last time, and he is not ready to return it back.. i ringed him today but he claims it's the first thing that has ever fitted correctly in his ears.. n make excuses everytime.. i am fearing he will take it with him to india.. next time u see him plz tell him to be a good boy (i mean.., uncle) n return it to me.. i cant listen my brother in law's songs now without the headphone.. if i put it in loudspeaker.. i might not return to india.. these guys have warned be thrice already not to do so.. they say its terrible.. :-(
speaking of borrowed items.., do u guys have any idea where that dildo i presented to yuvi is right now?? well.. that was in a very bad shape when it was in lady jaya's hands yesterday.. obviously it had to be.. heard later that lady jaya had an over or two with deergha pathan ;-) .. i however frankly dont know why chinnu popli was not seen anywhere for 3 hours after he got hold of that thing.. ironically, a male waiter and baja of baroda was also missing at that time..lol.. these guys are now out of control and now i pretend to be a female to escape these morons... can u ask vinnie dildo to take me in kkr next season (if kkr is playing next year.. lol..) .. u see.., mom called yesterday n i have also promised her like little john did a week ago (ganga jaisa.. lol..).. aajkalkey moms bhi naa...
i am receiving a lot of marriage proposals these days.. (holy potatoes.. u might think, but its true..).. there are a lot of appam lovers in south africa.. and i am a favourite here among 50+ ladies.. if u go to the malayalee restaurant in johannesburg u will see the menu item 'appam chutiya special'.. i can tell u by its name.., thats the worst thing u cud ever eat.. (it will help u find the shortest path to a nearby toilet, though.. lol..) but its this love and affection that i want.. i will do all kind of chutiyaa things that previous chutiyas has never even imagined of.. kishan kanhaiyaa sir (an ex-chutiya, btw).., u can rest when i am around.. keep this in mind when hitting on aunties in clubs before i do.. lol.. :-D
well.. after the entire team was satisfied.., i heard that the dildo was officially handed over to priety aunty by bublee.. she was very happy but that asshole didn't tell her i bought it.. i might have got the hug i am still waiting for.. who knows, i might have even got a kiss.. afterall it is a 'dildo'... as a matter of fact, that's the last thing i know abt my dildo.. in a way its lucky that it ended there.. had this dildo swapping game started with priety aunty, the whole team might have been in the hospital doing medical checkups today..lol... just imagine w.h.o claiming there's a new virus in south africa that's spreading more fastly and which is more deadly than swine flu.. lol..
but the latest news is that bunty uncle is having troubles sitting on chairs properly since he visited priety aunty.. doctors don't know what exactly is the problem, though.. lol.. cya guys later.. bye!
Dil pe mat le boss
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You truly are fake. but that's not what i mind as much as i mind the pot shots that you take at Sreesanth. give the kid a break. And pray tell me how his break dancing or whatever kid stuff he may come up with help the other team lose?? that's the most ridiculous and utterly immature thing to say. If the teams' mental make up is so fragile they stand to lose anyway. If it was a joke, it had nothing going for it because you just bowed to public pressure to jeer at someone who cannot stand for himself, cannot defend himself. A kid you have made a laughing stock of. All for some dumb publicity. Sexist jokes about Mandira aren't any better. Any woman entering the male bastion is a dumb fuck, right? If you need to pull her down, mention one out of the several stupid things that she says. Judge her on her performance in front of the camera. Tell us about the commerce that cricket is, the spectacle that it is..but maybe its too much to ask if your perspective or the organization that's you, is only limited to serving the lowest common denominator.
everything on tv is already sold out to the highest bidder.. so keep it up, but you don't impress me much.
The only SRK supporter on FIP
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SRK is always the king! He is not gay. He and K Jo are just very good friends. U guys r jelus.
A toZee of Bengal
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A is for Awpheesh (as in Office). This is where the average Kolkakatan goes and spends a day hard at work. And if he works for the 'Vest Bengal Gawrment' he will arrive at 10, wipe his forehead till 11, have a tea break at 12, throw around a few files at 12.30, break for lunch at 1, smoke the 7th unfiltered cigarette at 2, break for 5th cup of tea at 3, sleep sitting down at 4 and go home at 4:30. It's a hard life!
B is for Bhision. For some reason many Bengalis don't have good bhision. In fact in Kolkata most people are wearing spectacles all the time....Bhishon Bhalo and Bibhotso.... though means opposite ...used for same situations.. .depending on the Beauty of fairer sex...are close ...almost in a tie for second spot....
C is for Chappell. Currently, this is the Bengali word for the Devil, for the worst form of evil. In the night mothers put their kids to sleep saying, 'Na ghumoley ebar Chappell eshey dhorey niye jabe.'
D is for Debashish or any other name starting with Deb. By an ancient law every fourth Bengali Child has to be named Debashish. So you have a Debashish everywhere and trying to get creative they are also called Deb, Debu, Deba with variations like Debopriyo, Deboprotim, Debojyoti, etc. thrown in at times....as creations of God himself !!
E is for Eeesh. This is a very common Bengali exclamation made famous by Aishwarya Rai in the movie Devdas. It is estimated that on an average a Bengali, especially Bengali women, use eeesh 10,089 times every year. 'Ei Morechhey' is a close second to Eeesh.
F is for Feeesh. These are creatures that swim in rivers and seas and are a favourite food of the Bengalis. Despite the fact that a fish market has such strong smells, with one sniff a Bengali knows if a fish is all right. If not, he will say 'eeesh what feeesh is theesh!'
G is for Good name. Every Bengali boy will have a good name like Debashish or Deboprotim and a pet name like Motka, Bhombol, Thobla, etc. While every Bengali girl will have pet names like Tia, Tuktuki, Mishti, Khuku, et cetera.
H is for Harmonium. This Bengali equivalent of a rock guitar. Take four Bengalis and a Harmonium and you have the successors to The Bheatles!
I is for Ileesh. This is a feeesh with 10,987 bones which would kill any ordinary person, but which the Bengalis eat with releeesh!
J is for Jhola. No selfrespecting Bengali is complete without his Jhola. It is a shapeless cloth bag where he keeps all his belongings and he fits an amazing number of things in. Even as you read this there are two million jholas bobbling around Kolkata, and they all look exactly the same! Note that 'Jhol'with mysterious condiments.. . as in Maachher Jhol is a close second. Jhaamela and Jachhetai are distant 3rd and 4th
K is for Kee Kaando! It used to be the favourite Bengali exclamation till eeesh took over because of Aishwarya Rai.Kee mushkil is a close second.
L is for Lungi, the dress for all occasions. People in Kolkata manage to play football and cricket wearing it not to mention the daily trip in the morning to the local bajaar. Now there is talk of a lungi expedition to Mt Everest.
M is for Minibaas. These are dangerous half buses whose antics would effortlessly frighten the living daylights out of all James Bond stuntmen as well as Formula 1 race car drivers.
N is for Nangto. This is the Bengali word for Naked. It is the most interesting naked word in any language!
O is for Oil. The Bengalis believe that a touch of mustard oil will cure anything from cold (oil in the nose), to earache (oil in the ear), to cough (oil on the throat) to piles (oil you know where!).
P is for Phootball. This is always a phavourite phassion of the Kolkattan. Every Bengali is born an expert in this game. The two biggest clubs there are MOHUNBAGAN and East Bengal and when they play the city comes to a stop.
Q is for Koshchen (question) as in "Mamatadi koshchens Cheap Ministaar in Writaars Buiding."
R is for Robi Thakur. Many many years ago Rabindranath got the Nobel Prize. This has given the right to all Bengalis no matter where they are to frame their acceptance speeches as if they were directly related to the great poet and walk with their head held high. This also gives Bengalis the birthright to look down at Delhi and Mumbai and of course 'all non-Bengawlees'! Note that 'Rawshogolla' comes a close second!
S is for Shourav. Now that they finally produced a genuine cricketer, that too a captain, Bengalis think that he should be allowed to play until he is 70 years old.
T is for Trams. Hundred years later there are still trams in Kolkata. Of course if you are in a hurry it's faster to walk....Trams are still existing in Paris too.......you see !
U is for Aambrela. When a Bengali baby is born he is handed one.
V is for Bhaayolence. Bengalis are the most non-violent violent people around. When an accident happens they will fold up their sleeves, shout and scream and curse and abuse, "Chherey De Bolchhi" but the last time someone actually hit someone was in 1939.
W is for Water. For three months of the year the city is underwater and every year for the last 200 years the authorities are taken by surprise by this!
X is for X'mas. It's very big in Kolkata, with Park Street fully lit up and all Bengalis agreeing that they must eat cake that day.
Y is for Yesshtaarday. Which is always better than today for a Bengali (see R for Robi Thakur)?. It is also for Jubraj Shingh and Joga.
Z is for Jebra, Joo, and Jipper.
FIP ko shrap
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i hope u die a horrible death swallowing monkey's sperms and getting fucked in the ear by your favorite appam chutiya.
you will rot in hell along with prabhakaran and veerapan who will rape u every night
Don't let me earn millions
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FIP IS A COWARD... GUYS STOP VISITING HIS BLOG...
DON'T LET ME EARN MILLIONS BY FOOLING US...
STOP VISITING FIP BLOG
Leap over the shadow
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You bastard FIP
You see, kolkata can win even with spoilsport like you and your lordie......
And any leap-reader can say that its not you in video because your leap does not match with the shadow.......
Papa, FIP ke karan fail ho gaya...
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oh my god that was the lamest thing EVER!!!i freakin flunked my exm for this loser man!!he doesn even have the guts to say who the hell he is!!!
common man chickenin out ...
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what the bloody hell.....how can this guy not reveal his identity the stupid video doesnt say shit!!!!!common man come out in the open if u are tht bold with your writing what u chickenin out for????
Coward coward cheekh rahe ho ?
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Mdarchodon coward coward cheekh rahe ho, yeh nahi sochte ki koi bhi saamne aakar apni gaand khud kyon marwaa lega? Woh bhi sirf tum jaise chutiyon ki demand par jinhe yeh rahul bose lag raha hai!!
waiting to see you when u wants to see us...
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Hello Dost
Thanks for all the entertainment...Feeling bit sad today...But i will surely tell my grandchildrens about "The adventures of FIP"..
Nice to see the face,(though silhouette) & hear your voice....
waiting to see you when u wants to see us...
RIP till you born again..
Abhishek
Award for most politically correct comment goes to...
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Initially, I liked your blog, it was entertaining and I guess, the masala in your post was pretty good - an insider news that has never happened before.
As weeks passed by, I started feeling bad for KKR, not just that they were losing, they had to also deal with you. Every organization has problems - what matters is how you deal with those problems. If you have problem with the organization, feel free to walk out anytime. I realized that you were doing this for your 15 mins of fame. and bcz you are anonymous, you don't get those 15 mins of fame.
you posted so many things about so many ppl, you tell me...who has achieved perfect 10 in their life - not even our Mr. Gandhi. No one is perfect in life and neither or you nor SRK nor BN nor SS.
Congratulations to FIP for his 15 mins of faceless fame. I am not sure what enimity you have with the KKR and its crew or owners, but in any case, I think you went to far trying to destroy them.
Congratulations to KKR on winning the last 2 matches!!! I really admire the team for winning the last 2 matches, after what they have been through - kudos to skipper!!!
FIP Commentor gets death threat
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.hey you son of a bitch posting about fipcomments blog I'll fucking killl you if you spam again randi ke bachey
Barking from dark side, your blog was shit
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WTS AWESEOM YAA..I WAS TELLING U,THIS JERK WONT DISCLOSE HIMSELF, ALTHOUGH HE TOOK A POLING,& THERE TOO, 60% PEOPLE SAID TO COME OUT,BUT THIS MAN DINT,I KNEW IT FRM START,HE IS A COWARD & BARKING FROM DARK SIDE..
I JST CAN SAY, GET WELL SOON.. ITS NO USE OF THROWING STONS TO OTHERS,ITS MUCH BETTER TO WORK FOR UR OWN..
AND SOME PEOPLE NJOI IN READING PORN TOO, BUT IT DOESNT MEAN, THAT THAT PIECE OR WRK WIL B CONSIDERED AS GOOD..JUST LIK THAT, UR BLOG WERE SHIT..
FIP is a no one dude ...
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This is a no one dude. This guy isn't anyone from the KKR team, are you all high? All the blogs are made up shit, none of which are true. You have all been made a fool out of.
FIP dechipered
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you are a chute! you need to get some help! get yourself a fucking shrink you fucking psycho. Get a life! And to all the idiots who still dont get it, this guy is a FAKE! A real life loser!
Indian male most bloodiest in the world and soffocates Mandira
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all this makes one thing very clear. all indians are such hipocrites. they r such voyeurs nd they keep criticising ppl aka mandy nd te others saying they dont desrve ne respect.evryone(that includes me )is a voyeur here. otherwise why would ewe be such fans of this blog. arre doosro ko ungli dikhane se pehle apni to dekhlo.i hate that mandira bedi. muh kholti hai to lagta hai kuch uske muh me dalkar use sffocate karke maar daloo. but i've realised that i'm no different frm her. i read these blogs and she creates material for it. arre mofos tum bhi isi category me aate ho. now all indians have shown the whole world that we are the bloodiest voyeurs in the whole world. ab to yeh naari ki respect etc etc bakwaas karna chod do. sab ko pata chal gaya hai indian mentality. ek nonsense blog ke itne fans. as they say an indian male is the most dangerous and the bloodiest of all men on the planet. arre naariyon dont second the idea,but posting the kind of nonsense on this blog u hav shown that indian naari is as bad as the indian man. saalon ne izzat hi utaar di bharat ki.poora hindi me likhne ki koshish ki maine. par beech me thodi english aa gayi. mujhe sirf apne saathi indians ko yeh realise karana that ki hum kaise log hain. ab to apni sanskriti(culture) par naaz hona bandh kar do. indian movies soft porn se kuch kam nahi. aur ham english movies ki ninda karte hain. think abt it ppl(btw i'm in my early twenties nd have njoid this blog as much as u hav. so yeh mat sochna ki koi buddha sathiya gaya hai. all the opinions i've given in my comment are applicable even to me.jus' think abt it. its high time we gave up the hipocracy)
help me earn money, god bless you
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Hello FIP.,
I suggest to you that you should you use adsense for earn money from this very popular blog.
Why you don't use ? . you have not interest in Earn money or you don't have adsense account. if you don't have account then contact me at milanpbmilan@gmail.com.
please help me to earn money.god bless you
90% yours
and remaining 10% my,.
Blog Chutiya ?
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fake ipl player teri maa ki chut..bosdiwale randki beta..dont have de balls 2 reveal urslf den y did u post so many pools for....blog chutiya...
Ouch!
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ADITI I'LL SUCK YOU DRY AND CUT YOUR NIPPLES OFF AND THEN I'LL RUB SALT IN THEM
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NEWS REPORT: kelagod just died choking on his father's dick! thats the end of scumbag kelagod, the earth can now prosper without yet another dickless shitface.. rejoice peoples
Seedhi Baat
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u bloody assole. we don't care who you are. but if u have the guts, speak clearly and say what u want to say without mincing words.
If cricket matches are all fixed, say it in those words. give us examples of matches that were fixed.
If that bastard modi has bought media to make a fool of all indians, say it, dont just call him names.
If u want to do any good for cricket or cricket fans, come out with the facts. Else u are a fucking nobody.
Bechara Jazzman
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This IPL has proven that there are certain players who should not be allowed to enter a stadium, much less play a match there, and that too 20/20. Here is my list of players who should find another job and retire honorably NOW:
Ganguly
Sachin
VVS laxman
sehwag
Dravid
These may be good players of yesteryear and may occasionally knock the ball around for a century, but they are one of the most consistent duds on the 20/20 field. There are far more players on the bench who can come and do a better job than scoring run a ball.
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fuck u jazzman
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jazzman, go fuck yourself or suck yourself you asshole. You are no better than some of the so called anchors on Set Max who seem to know nothing about the nuances of this beautiful game.
Hype is the name of the game today and you idiots just prove that. Go get a life for yourself than accusing such great players. You fuckin dud
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jazzman bastard. son of a bitch
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mother fucker jazzman. oh yeah, your mom is no good for your dad anymore, so why dont you throw her out ? lol
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jazzam madarchod. dildo ki goti. jaa dildo ke blog aka sandas me jaa ke hag. lavde ke baal. jaa ke apne baap ki goti chus. aur apni bahan ko bhej de mere paas.
aur dildo ki gaand me ghusna mat bhoolna.
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How are you beta?
You don't know me but your mother does.
You have lived all these years with a big lie that your mother told you. You see I am your real father.
I left your mother years ago but what i did not know was that i had released some jizz in your mother's pussy when we last had sex. Ofcourse she was newly married at the time so your current father thought he had released the jizz. But it wasn't him. It was me. Mine is blue in color and my jizz fills up a cup.
You see beta now? Call me baba. Come on son, call me baba. Let these old years hear the word it has so long craved to hear.
Call me papa or baba or appa or even bapu. If you're the baap of all, imagine what that would make me.
-yours truly.
APPA PLAYER